A Smooth Day To Kiss
Elizabeth stepped pouty out into the shiny sunshine, and admired Rodney's hand. "Ah," she sighed, "That's a glorious sight."
Rodney climbed off the floor and walked huskily across the grass to greet his lover. Elizabeth patted Rodney on the lips and then tried to kiss him perfectly, but without success.
"That's all right," Rodney said. "We can try again later."
"I'm just not dull," Elizabeth. "Not as dull as the time we licked at the door."
Rodney nodded mordibly. "We were bright back in those days."
"Our necks were younger, and we had a lot more fun with them," Elizabeth said. "Everything seems spiky and glowing when you're young."
"Of course," Rodney said. "But now we're feathery, we can still have fun. If we go about it darkly."
"Darkly?" Elizabeth said . "But how?"
"With this," Rodney said and held out a glossy desk. "Just take that with some water and in half an hour, you'll be ready to kiss."
Elizabeth swallowed the desk at once and sure enough, in half an hour, they were able to kiss darkly. They licked like the cat that caught the canary. Three times.
And then the neighbour told them to get off his lawn.
A Maple Syrup In Time
On a spiky and glorious morning, Elizabeth sat at the door. It was Valentine's Day and she was all alone. Her neck ached in sorrow for the secret love that she could never share. How could she expect Rodney to love someone with a glowing hand?
Huskily, she began to recite a poem she had composed. "Ah, my love is like a glossy feathery floor, all on a summer's day. I wish my Rodney would kiss me, in his own dull way..."
"Do you?" Rodney sat down beside Elizabeth and put his hand on Elizabeth's lips. "I think that could be arranged."
Elizabeth gasped perfectly. "But what about my glowing hand?"
"I like it," Rodney said pouty. "I think it's bright."
They came together and their kiss was like the cat that caught the canary.
"I love you," Elizabeth said mordibly.
"I love you too," Rodney replied and licked her.
They bought a bunny, moved in together, and lived darkly ever after.
I'm Dreaming Of A Spiky Christmas
It was Christmas Eve. Elizabeth sat pouty at the door, sipping shiny eggnog.
She looked at the glossy maple syrup hanging on the Christmas Tree and sighed. Last year, Rodney had hung it there, just before they looked at each other huskily and then fell into each other's arms and licked each other's neck.
If only I hadn't been so dull, Elizabeth thought, pouring a glowing amount of rum into her eggnog. Then Rodney might not have got so smooth and left me all alone at Christmas time. She wiped away a bright tear and held her lips in her hand.
Suddenly, there was a knock at the door and then a glorious voice lifted mordibly up in song.
I'm dreaming of a spiky Christmas
Just like the cat that caught the canary
Elizabeth ran to the door. It was Rodney, looking feathery all over with snow.
"I missed you darkly," Rodney said. "And I wanted to kiss your neck again."
Elizabeth hugged Rodney and started to sob.
"I think you're drunk," Rodney said.
"I think so too," Elizabeth said and they licked each other's neck until they knocked the Christmas tree over.
On Christmas Day the ate roasted bunny hand and live together perfectly until elizabeth got drunk again.
A Bright Occurrence
Elizabeth paced up and down, jiggling her hand. Her very good friend, Mary Sue Floor, had arranged to meet her here at the door. "I have something spiky to tell you," she had said.
Mary Sue Floor was late, which was very unlike her. Any moment now, Elizabeth expected to see her bounce up, her glowing hair streaming behind her and her glossy eyes aglow.
Elizabeth heard footsteps, but they seemed rather smooth for a delicate and dull girl like Mary Sue Floor, whose tread was feathery. She turned around and found Rodney staring at her.
"What are you doing here?" Rodney said pouty. "I thought you said you didn't want to see me again."
Elizabeth had said that, but now she was beginning to wish she hadn't acted so huskily. "Mary Sue Floor asked to meet me here." As she gazed at Rodney, her neck began to throb mordibly.
"Oh," Rodney said, perfectly. "I'll just go then."
"Wait," Elizabeth said and caught Rodney by his lips. "I was wrong. I still love you. Can you ever forgive me?"
"Yes," Rodney said, smiling. They wrapped their arms around each other and kissed, like the cat that caught the canary.
From behind a desk, Mary Sue Floor watched with a shiny light in her glorious eyes. She took a list out of her pocket, and checked off "Elizabeth/Rodney". Then, she skipped off to help an embittered man find love again, just as soon as she'd saved the bunny from extinction
Feathery Lang Syne
Elizabeth sipped darkly at her drink and stood feathery behind a desk. She wasn't sure why she had come to this New Year's Eve party in the first place. She was no good at parties anyhow. They always made her feel spiky and she ended up like she was now, hiding and hoping nobody noticed how bright her neck got when she was nervous.
Well, truth be told, Elizabeth knew very well why she was at the party: to see Rodney.
Ah, Rodney. Just the thought of him, the chance of a glimpse of his dull lips made Elizabeth's heart beat like the cat that caught the canary.
But tonight everyone was masked. Elizabeth peered huskily through the crowd, trying to guess which guest was Rodney. There, she thought, the man over by the maple syrup, the shiny one with the bunny mask. It had to be Rodney. No one else could look so glorious, even in a bunny mask.
He began to walk Elizabeth's way and Elizabeth started to panic. What if he actually talked to Elizabeth?
Rodney came right up to Elizabeth and Elizabeth thought that she was going to faint.
"Hello," Rodney said pouty. "What are you doing over here all alone?"
"Oh, just looking at the floor," Elizabeth said and immediately wanted to die because that sounded so smooth.
Just then, a glossy voice began to count down. "Ten ... nine ... eight ... seven ..."
Elizabeth's heart leapt. If they were together at midnight, that meant that Rodney might ...
"Happy New Year!"
Rodney swept Elizabeth into his arms, bent her at the door, and kissed Elizabeth mordibly, slipping her the tongue and groping her hand.
Elizabeth could hardly believe it. How wonderful! And now that it was after midnight, it was time to take their masks off. She reached out perfectly and pulled Rodney's mask off his face. It was Rodney! "I knew it was you," Elizabeth said and took her own mask off.
"And it's ... you," Rodney said. "You know, I'm just going to go get some punch."
Elizabeth watched him go. He would be right back, Elizabeth was sure. Just as soon as he had his punch.
And then they would fall in love.
I think the fourth one makes a surprising amount of sense for something completely randomly generated...