Log in

No account? Create an account

Previous Entry | Next Entry

Real story for once!

Well I actually did that challenge...not sure how it turned out, apart from disturbing. Comments appreciated.

And whilst you're here maybe if anyone is inclined you could take a look at my only other original piece.

Untold - for which I have only 2 people's opinions on. MA who very nicely described it as interesting and Henry (my boyfriend) who seemed to miss the point of it and thought it meant something else entirely (which I can't yet tell if it was just him or if I wrote it badly.)

Untold here...

And my new original fiction based on the challenge. Slighlty over one page but still I'm pleased with.

A/N: A little original fiction piece of mine - copyright to me and so no reposting or archiving - but linking to this is okay if you for some reason want to as long as true credit is given.

Survival: Part One

She bit her lip and decided to changed her stance so that she was standing straight, staring back at him with equal intensity. Which was a hard task. His eyes were hard and cold, an unwavering gaze resting solely on her.

He stood across from her, blocking the door, her escape. She wanted close her eyes and give in, to submit to everything and make life simple but she knew that wasn't the answer. She had to fight or else nothing meant anything. She'd gotten this far, she couldn't stop here. She'd get out of here because she had to, that was what had pulled her along all this way. It was like a debt she owed, a promise to fulfil, and that make it simple. It made the pain of her wrists where the rope had worn through the skin, from her struggling to free herself, bearable; that it had a purpose.

Her eyes dropped down to the floor, avoiding his study of her. Her skin crawled under that penetrating gaze. It made her feel like he could read her mind, every thought that crossed it, that by looking into her eyes he could know her next move. Maybe he could.

Because she'd always felt there was something otherworldly about him. An aura of the ethereal. She'd just never given much thought whether he was a demon or an angel in that sense. Only the devil himself had been an angel once and so it struck her that no matter what he'd done now he'd been normal too in a time she wasn't sure of. That was what haunted her. She knew he wouldn't let her go and that she had to get away, two things that conflicted with each other and resulted in one clear conclusion. She had to hurt him.

But he was still human and he hadn't really done anything yet. Everything that had happened could just be put down to a massive error of judgement, something that she could forgive if it ended here.


The unnerved tone of her voice was stark in the silence of the house and there was no way he hadn't heard her calling out to him.

And yet he stood there, hands dangling at his sides, face tipped down slightly but his gaze upwards. A gaze that was unending and directed at her.

“Sebastian, please, it's not too late to stop this nonsense.” she appealed.

He said nothing in response to her plea. She swallowed in fear. She wanted it to be over, to end right now. Why couldn't the ordeal end here? There had to be a way to get through to him. Her words couldn't fail her today.

She stepped forward, one foot at a time cautiously.

“Really, I mean it. We can pretend like it never happened.”

She tried to smile with that, as she approached him, but she felt a rising panic at the returning proximity to him. All she wanted was to be as far from here as she could get.

However, she carried on forward, braving the situation. It had after all been worse than this earlier. Now she had a chance to make things better. A few moments of suffering and it could be ended. Even though it was torture to force herself to go further she put the fear aside in favour of logic. Yes, she was getting closer to him but he was at the door and that put her closer to getting out here too. With that she sped up, wishing only to escape, and if that meant having to face off her kidnapper then so be it.

Finally she stood in front of him, some of her fear channeled into anger, her emotions useful at last. A defense; she wasn't going to be intimidated by him any longer, despite all he'd committed so far.
“This ends here.” she demanded, brushing past him a few steps, making towards the door but paused, waiting for approval or acceptance. She wasn't sure which is was though.

Her eyes blazed defiantly, looking straight into his, searching for something she couldn't name that needed to be there. A sharp movement caught her off guard, his hand catching her forearm in a crushing grasp. She gasped in alarm and tried to flee but found it too late for that.

He had tightened his grip. Fascinated by what he saw there – the bulging flesh around the digging fingers of his and the paling section of her arm below where he held it. Then he slowly returned his attention to her anxiously face. Her eyes widened as she met his own.

“Yes, Sylvia,” he responded calmly and surely, “ it will end here...and now, I promise.”
And he smiled deeply at that. He'd always been a man who kept a promise, she'd appreciated that, until now. Because it was written on his face exactly how this would end.

His green eyes that she'd thought dull now seemed to be for once full of passion instead of blank as she'd been so used to seeing day after day; they contained a greed for life that scared her beyond belief.

“Shh, dear Sylvia. Don't worry. You won't hurt any more, not for long” he whispered into her ear. She shivered, body trembling at his too warm touch. Maybe he'd been human, maybe not. She'd had faith everyone was ultimately good, she'd liked him which made it harder to believe he could be anything truly bad...but...

She never finished the thought properly, as pulled back her hair exposing her neck, examining it with a tenderness before he brutally twisted and pulled it around.
He took her in his arms fully as he'd heard the crack and cradling her limp body he danced sweetly with her; satisfied for the first time in his life.


Thoughts? I know it's not a happy ending but they aren't always. I've now done a parallel story for this. Next post up.


( 1 comment — Leave a comment )
Apr. 2nd, 2005 01:05 am (UTC)
Oh wow, that was incredible. I loved the demon/angel analogy, and though the end made me a little queasy (that's my worst fear, is to see someone I know break their neck...no idea why...), I really liked it.

It would be interesting to see the parallel version.

( 1 comment — Leave a comment )

Latest Month

May 2013



Page Summary

Powered by LiveJournal.com
Designed by Carrie Keymel